Testing the soapbox

Yesterday I got on my soapbox and preached perseverance. An hour later mine was tested. I was 2 seconds away from failing were it not for the blessing of friends.

Lately I have been emailing my sister quite regularly. She is stuck in the middle of this divorce with no one to turn to. (God is there…I keep telling her). She is not taking it well. I listened to the stories drenched in pain. My heart started to ache and I just couldn’t take it anymore. To make matters worse, I was asked to share a short message to a group of teens about ‘family’. How can I share about that when mine is such a shining example of not being one! I stared at the blank page for 2 hours. Got up to go ask a question to my friend and broke down in her office instead.

I am going through such a big thing at the moment. God has been doing some amazing things in my life and I would like to share it with them. But how can I share joy to people who can only see the empty glass? They are not ready for it. I cried because they are three people going through the exact same thing and they are not talking to each other. I cried because my mom and sister no longer talk to each other. They were once inseparable. I cried because they all hurt so much and they are running in the wrong directions…O LORD HELP THEM PLEASE!

At the end of the day I had to go and babysit one of my dearest little friends. She is three years old and possibly on of the cutest little girls alive! It was here that I realised the point of the message I was to give the next day. As I sat there next to her playing with magical wooden blocks constructing kitty-baths, I was amazed at how much she felt like family. (okay so for some of you this might be a ‘duh’ moment but my family history aint the brightest Manet-painting – more like a Jackson Pollock). This time with Tessa was great. It lifted my spirit and gave me hope…

 

So today I just finished the message. It was one of the most terrifying experiences I have lived through. Thirty seven youth between the ages of 13 – 17! But we connected and I hope and pray that they got the point… I praise the LORD for giving me this opportunity. As a very wise friend said afterward: “It is now in God’s Hands”.